Where to go and what to say…

So, I have been in a dilemma.  The next part of my story has people who are still around, still living in the same place.  As time marched on, relationships that had broken down have been mended, and I am not too sure how to handle this.  Maybe I should have pinned a name, to be anonymous, but that is not me.  I do not want to open old wounds, but since I have started writing this blog, my nightmares are dwindling down.  As a child, my world revolved around friends, sports, cheerleading, and who the “hottest” guys were.  I know I was a handful, I know I was difficult, and I know that I was in for a hell of a time for the next 4 years.

So for those of you following this blog, I apologize for taking so long to move forward.  I have been going over and over this issue in my mind, and I do not want to hurt feelings.  I think most kids have issues with their parents, but the difference is that “most kids” understand they have unconditional love.  I felt like I had love, but if I screwed up I was out.  I remember my high school years very fondly, but outside of school I struggled, to the point I thought about ending my own life.  Thank God I was afraid of hurting myself, so my attempt wasn’t significant, and I don’t think anyone picked up on it, as I was happy at school.

I am starting this up again, it is very therapeutic for me, and talking to myself this way is better than any counselor I have ever met.  Sorry again for the delay, this is a big step for me again, and I am ready for it.

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